Researchers have discovered that black mascara causes several previously unknown ailments, including depression, uncontrollable crying and the urge to cut shapes and misspelled slogans into arms and legs. To make matters worse, mascara has been blamed for increasing the sales of shitty music.  In response to this amazing discovery, all black mascara is being pulled from shelves immediately, and emergency measures are being discussed by world leaders.
The so-called “Emo community” is not pleased:
The non-conforming conformist Emos have promised to blare Sunny Day Real Estate in the streets while slicing at their appendages with dull scissors until this “heinous travesty” has …read more

October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month and although there are more breast cancer survivors today than in the past due to numerous advances in science and medicine, many women still lose the fight. Approximately 180,000 (1 out of 8!) women were diagnosed with breast cancer last year in the United States alone.
Believer and artist Michael Rosner (Eye Level Studio) have designed a limited edition shirt to sell during the month of October with proceeds being donated to breast cancer research. Please join Believer and Eye Level Studio in helping to find a cure and honor “The Brave” women who have …read more

So I have spent the better part of the day going through my Twitter followers, weeding out the spammers, the “social marketing experts” and the people who just don’t update anymore, and I decided to create a list of some of my favorite Twitterers (Tweeters? Twats?). I was originally going to list 10, which quickly became 20, and soon I just needed to just pick a number and stick to it. 50 works.

I picked these 50 for a variety of reasons… because they make me laugh, because they are very active, because they are consistently interesting… and in one case …read more

Proving yet again that the proper application of drugs, tranny sex and just plain bizarre habits will make you capable of beating pretty much any illness, Marilyn Manson has announced that he has contracted the H1N1 virus, also known as Swine Flu. Manson states:
“So I have officially been diagnosed, by a real doctor, with THE SWINE FLU. I know everyone will suggest that fucking a pig is how this disease was obtained. However, the doctor said, my past choices in women have in no way contributed to me acquiring this mysterious sickness. Unfortunately, I am going to survive.”
Hey, he said …read more

Arkard wrote a hilarious and awesome article about the different genres of metal over at Cracked.com. Here is his flowchart to help you figure out how to determine what genre of metal you are listening to right now:

So what freaky sub-genre are you currently listening to? Go read Arkard’s post, it’s \m/.
[image: Arkard/Cracked]

Bravewords.com posted this report earlier:
Authorities in San Diego County have confirmed that the remains of several bodies have been unearthed in the backyard garden of a coastal San Diego home on Wednesday.
Authorities found the bodies after an anonymous tip led them to the location.
For much of the day Sunday, neighbors tried to catch a glimpse of what was going on as a number of detectives were digging in what appears to be a vegetable garden of the home, located just off Interstate 5.
Then around 9 PM, they watched as several body bags were rolled out on stretchers from behind the …read more

Today (August 20) marks what would have been Dimebag Darrell’s 43rd birthday. In tribute to Dimebag, I wanted to write a post honoring his life and his contributions to not only metal, but to his friends, family and all of us fans.

Nicholas Birch of The Irish Times reports that Turkish Prime Minister Tayyip Erdogan ordered the arrest of several men in Istanbul last weekend after flashing the metal salutes to a passing cavalcade.
Yusuf Sengul was attending a metal festival with 4 of his friends, when they made the sign at the passing vehicles. Sengul stated:
“The tinted windows of one of the cars opened and a guy in dark glasses shouted ‘what the hell are you doing’… They said they were acting on the orders of the prime minister, we were laughing. We thought it was a joke.”
It was no joke. All …read more

Kind of after a last minute decision on Friday night, my friend Martin and I decided to go see Kreator, Exodus, Belphagor, Warbringer and Epicurean last night and man, I’m glad we did. Two veteran thrash bands on one bill, tearing it up like it was 1986.

It was crowded for 7:30 when we got there. Epicurean was playing and they were extremely loud, but pretty good. I’m not familiar with the band but they have a thrashy, almost death metal sound to them. I guess one of their guitar players bailed on them.

Bravewords.com reminded me that today (may 13th) would have been the late Death singer, Chuck Schuldiner’s 42nd birthday. Chuck died of complications of the brain cancer in December of 2001. He established himself as an icon in [death] metal and will forever be missed. Rest In Peace, Chuck.